Am I being desperate?
My boyfriend decided he wanted to take a break from me last night and I am distraught. We have been best friends for the past ten years and together on and off for about 5 years. We got back together about a year ago and we fight alot. He cheated on me and it was something that I couldn't seem to let go of and I guess I rubbed it in his face alot. I am hopeless without him, I love him more than anything. So I guess my question is should I fight for him or give him his space. I can't picture my life without him in it and I can't be just friends with him either. I guess I'm just scared because what if we take our break and he realizes he doesn't love me anymore. I'm desperate and heartbroken.
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I was in a similar situation myself. I believed that if we did take a break he would realize he does not love me so we kept dating. The relationship got worst and we ended it after two months. Now looking back maybe if we took that break when he suggested it maybe we would be still together. I dont know what the right answer but do what your heart tells you. If he is asking you to take a break to date other women then let him go, but if he wants for you to clear up your thoughts and for himself then the break might work. Good luck!!!!!
It sounds like he doesn't love you. If you love someone you wouldn't cheat on them. When he cheated on you did you ask him why? Sometimes the answer to "do he love you" is in the "why he cheated" answer. Like, it could be he felt no love by you. What I'm trying to say is if he's missing something in the relationship (most guys don't tell you unless you read their minds) he more than likly left the relationship to find it , instead of communicating with you about it. So if you want to save the relationship ask the questions he really do not want to answer and you have to be open to the answer if he answer it. But if you love yourself, really love yourself move on and if he loves you he will come back with a clear head.
You are not desperate your just in love. I know its hard but you need to let him have his space. Maybe a little time apart will make him realize that his life is not the same without you or maybe he'll realize that your not what he wants. In that case you need to just let it go and move on with your life. You need to realize that life doesn't end and there will be other guys out there. Futhermore why would you want to be with a guy that cheats on you?
I think you are, and you should give him and while you're at it - you - some space. The relationship seems to have gone on the rocks and the only thing to do now is let it go and see how it progresses. Just remember that if he is yours, he will come back to you and if he does realise he never loved you, then it was never meant to be. No point in putting all your (possibly false) hope in this one guy - you will be the hearbroken one in the end.
It's okay to take a little time off. You've already taken the time to figure out you've had difficulty getting over his cheating and he will surely figure out he misses you, if you give him a chance to miss you. Perhaps its time to allow some of the "mystery" about you back - leave him be and don't contact him if you really want him. He'll be back. He's taking a break, not breaking it off, unless you push too hard.
Yes, you are being desperate. Start having some self respect and dump this guy. Then, instead of working on a new relationship, work on your own strength of character. If you feel you need someone else for a sense of self-worth then you will always be dependent on them. It is not comfortable for you or them. Relationships that last AND are happy are those that carry mutual respect and a degree of Independence.
Forget about what he needs. You need space from this whole relationship. You need time for yourself to consider the fact that maybe this isn't what you really want. I know that after being with someone for so long makes it difficult for someone to move on. But you need to be happy with yourself before you can be happy in a relationship.
Lily, just give him the break he so desires, if he's yours, he must surely come back afterall, u'v been 2 long together but remember 10yrs is too much for a mere relationship.
i think u are being a little desparate. if he cheated on u, why on earth did u go back to him? i would think that u mightve learned ur lesson the first time. if yall fight a lot, y r u still together? if u dont like my advice, im sry, its just what was on my mind after i read ur details....good luck with w/e it is that u choose to do.
It sounds like you're addicted to him. But look what you just told us! He cheated on you and you still can't live without him?? And you're afraid that if you take a break he might realize he doesn't love you anymore--um.....he cheated on you....he doesn't love anybody but himself.