Do you never feel like you need some personal space yourselves? I often see men on here complaining that women want hugs all the time and are clingy physically. We feel like that too at times and having someone inside you and on top of you is horrible when you need some space. For me this is often when I have been at work all day having people demand things from me and then with the kids having them climbing all over me and demanding things from me and quite often by the evening I just want to be alone and not have to speak to anybody or have anyone near me.
Do some men really never feel like this?
Or do they feel like that about conversation and hugs but are always up for sex?
Update:Wealthy cowboy - my husband does help out with the kids - its saturday lunchtime now and he has just got in with them - he takes them out for breakfast and the park every saturday to give me a lie in. He does bedtime stories half the time and he feels as I do - by the time the day is over we like to sit in companionable silence doing our own thing, I read and he plays poker online. We talk when we need to and we have friday nights together where I cook something special and he buys wine and we have good conversation and sex. We probably have sex 2-3 times a week usually at the weekend and this suits both of us. I do NOT want a man who wants me to talk a lot or who talks a lot himself. I have ended previous relationships because of this. It is a myth that women want a man to listen to them all the time whilst they talk about their feelings. :-P
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The problem with your question is that it's gender specific!
See, you claim that you're aiming your question at "men who fail to understand when their partner does not want sex" when in fact the real question should be "individuals who fail to understand when their partner does not want sex."
Now if you do go gender specific, you should at least acknowledge that there is significant number of women (perhaps not a majority, but still) who do use sex as leverage over men, and that in some of these cases, these women are intentionally depriving their male partners of sex willfully whilst other women are neglectfully starving their male partners of sex.
You say that you and your husband have sex 2-3 times a week...but what do you say to a man whose wife will not even entertain the thought of having sex even once for weeks or months? Believe it or not, but there are also those men out there! And what do you say about a society that considers it improper for a man to expect sex on a regular (not every day, but regular) basis, and also considers it improper for a man to decline the sexual advances of his wife?
After all, a feminist authored study of domestic violence in the UK, and a French court that fined a man nearly $100,000 speaks to the voracity of hypocrisy when it comes to sex and gender! The messages being sent: a woman has a right to refuse without being judged, while a man who refuses could find himself being judged BY A FREAKING COURT OF LAW!!!!
Let's return to your question: when a man partners up with someone, as long as there is a reasonable expectation of having sex on a regular basis, most men (like most women) can be very sensitive to their partner's needs. I've never known a man who wants to "get it on" with a partner (man or woman...I have straight, gay and bisexual friends) who isn't up for sex...it's like an enormous mood kill!
That is not to say that there aren't men who always want sex regardless of how their partner is feeling...there absolutely is...just as there's a smaller bloc of women in society who always want sex. Perhaps many of them have a sex addiction...or perhaps they love it so much that they just don't care if their partner is into it or not.
And there are women who want men to be emotionally responsive to their needs at all times, and no doubt a smaller bloc of men who expect this of their female partners as well.
I think the key is that we assume that being emotionally responsive at all times is easier than being sexually responsive at all times, when in fact they really are two sides of the same coin!
If it's a myth that women want a man to listen to them all the time whilst they talk about their feelings, it's also a myth to suggest that men ALWAYS want sex from women. Sometimes, sex can be the last thing a man wants!
Sex is physically demanded in most males due to testosterone. While hugs and conversation do well for emotional connections, and at times relieving stress, neither are vital requirements demanded by ones' hormones. Women are very similar in that they produce estrogen but can usually put off intercourse for longer periods. There are several times I feel the same way you do after coming home from work but thanks to the way I schedule sex with my partner we both do just fine. It's perfectly normal to schedule sex as you would anything else and it opens up your life to more opportunity. Making a regular schedule and keeping to it no matter what ensures that both parties receive the required amount of hormone regulation and overall makes you closer and happier. All this really depends on the two in the relationship and how well you handle each others stress and affection.
So you want strangers on the internet to generalize about all men currently on the planet Earth.
Okaaaaaaay.
At any rate, what goes on in a relationship between two people where sex is concerned is as varied as the number of lunatics currently on Y/A.
No two people's sex lives are the same. Some people are frigid while others or sex addicts.
Why don't you try talking to your partner and working something out, or find a new partner...
I have no idea what you are speaking approximately Hon. I've by no means heard of claiming "no" and being impotent as being referred to as one within the identical. Perhaps the rerason you suppose that is since this is a stereotype that guys by no means refuse intercourse, with anybody, at any time, and that females are meant to. If a person refuses intercourse from a lady he is homosexual, and if a lady asks for it, she's a sIut. We're all doomed.
It's understandable if a woman doesn't feel well enough to have sex right at that moment. Most men understand this, and yes we can feel like that too sometimes. But women need to understand that it's their duty to satisfy their husband's/boyfriend's needs. It's not okay to deny having sex with their man and use this as a tool to get what they want.
@jessica- if your man helped out more with the kids, and listened to you more and talked with your emotional things you want to talk about would it change the frequency of sex? What if he made you "O" several times during sex?
They do understand. They just don't care.