3 Midgets are in a bar arguing.

"I have the smallest hands in the world!" says the first.

"I have the smallest feet in the world!" says the second.

"I have the smallest d*ck in the world!" says the third.

The bartender eventually gets annoyed and says, "Enough is enough! Tomorrow you all go down to the Guinness Book of World Records and get your claims confirmed."

This they do. The first midget returns to the bar with a trophy "Smallest hands in the World" and a check for £5,000. The second returns to the bar with a trophy "Smallest feet in the World" and a check for £5,000.

The third returns in a terrible mood, stomps into the bar and shouts, "Who in the hell is George Bush?"