I was diagnosed bipolar at 16 and am now 20 and 6 months ago the hospital diagnosed me with schizoaffective disorder. This year my lows have never been so bad. It doesn't just happen out of nowhere, I wake up and I know if it is going to be a really bad day. I have stopped harming myself these past two months but become extremely suicidal on these days. I have a doc and am on a lot of meds that control my paranoia and delusions but cannot afford a therapist. When I first started seeing my doc at 16 he said I would get better over time but am worse than ever considering I am on meds. Is it typical to become so much worse when this disorder developes.
Update:Im on 500mg of seroquel, klonopin twice a day, lithium twice a day, ambian, and welbutrin. I really can't see a therapist because of money, it's $50 a visit and I can't pay that with my doc visits. My psychotic symptoms are extreme paranoia, delusions, and at tiimes halucinations. For example at one time I thought my mom was trying to murder me and that a demon was entering my dreams and controlling me. Those have long passed though. I self harmed for the most part because I liked the way it felt, not because of depression. I don't know why that would make me sexually frustrated, that's kind of a strange thing to say.
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i'm sorry i don't know much about this disorder, but no one has answered and i wanted to let you know that you can get better and overcome it. i'm only 15 and have been on antidepressants before for anxiety and depression and still struggle with anxiety although i know it's not the same thing. i often also wake up and feel as if the day is already going to be terrible. you're not alone. i think if you could afford it a therapist would be worth it but since you can't just keep fighting and you'll get through it. on the days when you're feeling low, try to focus on the positive things in your life or things that make you happy.
there's this song by the spill canvas called "self conclusion":
We all flirt with the tiniest notion
Of self conclusion in one simplified motion
You see the trick is that you're never supposed to act on it
No matter how unbearable this misery gets
this lyric stuck out to me. life is beautiful, even through the pain. don't act on your misery, nothing is worth your life. wish you the best luck. <3 sorry for not being very helpful and quoting a band you've probably never heard of.
You should list off your meds cause that's what your asking about it sorta seems.
Anyhow, anti-psychotics inhibit your dopamine and serotonin pathways and that does quite the number on your level of initiative and overall happiness.
You still on a mood stabiliser? maybe its time to play with the mood meds. There's 3 main drugs for mood treatment for schizoaffective disorder. If your not on a mood stabiliser anymore then its time to get back on, and thats not anti-depressants. Bipolar is not treated by anti-depressants, but actually made worse. If you do need them, you'd need lithium, depakote ER, or Tegretol. Though it could've always been schizoaffective and was diagnosed incorrectly to start and that would mean that you might not have bipolar and that means you can take anti-depressants. But again if its bipolar, you can't.
More information on the nature of your psychotic symptoms, the meds your taking, and perhaps more reasons than money as to why your not in therapy for your past acts of self-harm are the only way to figure anything out in your question. Your self-harming; that means you've probably suffered some kind of sexual/physical/verbal abuse or at minimum a very distant father + nutjob of a mom, and that needs treatment by a therapist as much as it needs treatment by medication or you'll just wind up incredibly sexually frustrated and overall unhappy.
I also have schizoaffective disorder, same as you, I just wanted to say you can IM me or email me anytime, if you'd like.
[email protected] for yahoo! IM
BigReticMike for skype
and [email protected] for e-mail .
It may be as a result of the medications, or interactions; (probability is high) see www.drugs.com Contact the prescriber ASAP. View http://your-mental-health.weebly.com/k.html about natural treatments and page D about suicidal thoughts; teen resources; see page 2. Self harm; pages 1, & A. Use the hotlines, chat rooms, and forums. PSYCHOSIS: Take at least 4 Omega 3 fish oil supplements, (high in E.P.A.) or the recommended dose of a high quality of fish oil daily, like Carlsons, or Melrose: (certified free of mercury) it is best if consumed with an antioxidant, such as an orange, or its FRESHLY SQUEEZED juice. If vitamin E is added, it should be certified as being 100% from natural sources, or it may be synthetic: avoid it! Basically, if a vitamin supplement shows dl, which is the acronym for dextro-levo, it contains both isomers, and is therefore synthetic in origin. View: http://www.google.com.au/search?hl=en&source=hp&bi... Females may benefit by balancing the DHA, & EPA versions of Omega 3 in fish, or krill** oil with ALA flaxseed oil Omega 3, or at least one heaped tablespoonful of ground flaxseed, daily. Vegetarians: Google: "Omega 3; algae; supplies" and use with flaxseed. Use the www.mercola.com ** SEARCHBAR. Dr. J Cannell, at http://vitamindcouncil.org/ recommends 20,000iu of vitamin D3 daily, with frequent testing to ensure levels of at least 100nmol/l are maintained, for psychosis, and then reduce to around 5000 IU daily (Dr. Mercola recommends 5000 IU to 8000 IU for most healthy people). Dr. Kim, at www.drbenkim.com holds similar views. FOR PEOPLE NOT SUFFERING FROM PSYCHOSIS (HALLUCINATIONS & DELUSIONAL STATES): Dr Mercola, at http://www.mercola.com/ advises: in the winter months, if not getting sufficient daily exposure to strong light, go to a doctor and ask for a 25(OH)D, also called 25-hydroxyvitamin D, blood test. When you get the results, don’t follow the typical “normal” reference range, as these are too low. The OPTIMAL value that you’re looking for is 45-52 ng/ml (115-128 nmol/l)".
The company which tests your levels has to be one of those using the correct form of test, and this topic is addressed via the searchbar at Mercola.com - "vitamin D3; testing". View http://drbenkim.com/vitamin-d-facts.htm & http://articles.mercola.com/sites/articles/archive... 59% of Americans are deficient in the extremely important vitamin D3, with their lowest levels occurring in late winter, and early spring. People with the lowest levels are 11 times more likely to suffer depression (psychosis can occur with major depression). Dr. Cannell advises that the co-factors most often deficient in the American diet, and necessary to optimise its absorption, and utilisation are magnesium, zinc, boron, and vitamin K2 ( http://articles.mercola.com/sites/articles/archive... Mercola have supplies of the considerably more bioactive Menaquinone-7 variety of vitamin K2). Otherwise, I recommend using either health food/vitamin stores, or Googling: " ... ; supplies" rather than risking any old, or substandard products at supermarkets, or even on pharmacy shelves. The Omega 3 and vitamin D3 will act as preventatives for a wide variety of disorders and diseases, both physical and psychological, as well as boosting your immune system, and are 2 that most people in Western countries are deficient in, so I suggest that you recommend them to others as well. The best dietary source of vitamin K2 is natto (Only FERMENTED soy products, like natto are safe for females). 10,000iu/daily is generally regarded as safe daily upper limit for vitamin D3, although some people may need 3 times as much, and it is worth checking AFTER you have been using effective strength supplements for 3 months to make sure you have achieved as safe level according to Dr Mercola's suggestions.