hey this is my speech, please tell me what u think:
Hi I’m here to talk to you about the 40-hour famine that’s taking place between the 21st and the 23rd of august this year.
I’m taking part, and doing my bit to help the young kids that are suffering everyday from starvation in over 30 countries around the world. When we started talking about the food crisis, there were 900 million people who could barley afford food for one main meal a day. We are now estimating that the number of people facing chronic hunger and poverty in 2009 will reach more than 1 billion!
25,000 children are dying from starvation and very preventable diseases a day.
To raise money to help them I’m going without food, furniture and technology for 40 hours. You can help me buy donating any amount of money that you feel suitable. For every $40 I raise I’m helping 5 children for a month and for every $80 I’m helping 10 children for a month. My goal is to raise $150 which will help 18 children for a month.
Answers & Comments
Verified answer
This is quite well done. It makes a colorful and interesting emotional appeal without wasting a lot of words.
Here's a little editing:
_____________________________
Hi, everyone.
I’m here to tell you about the "Forty Hour Famine" that’s taking place between the 21st and the 23rd of August this year.
I’m taking part, and doing my bit to help little kids from more than 30 countries -- little kids who are starving. When we started talking about the food crisis, there were 900 million people who could barely afford one meal a day. Now the number of people facing chronic hunger and poverty has reached more than 1 billion!
Every day, 25,000 children die from starvation and preventable diseases.
To raise money to help them, I’m going without food, furniture and technology for 40 hours. You can help me by donating as generously as you can. Every $40 I raise helps 5 children for a month; every $80 helps 10. My goal is to raise $150, which will help 18 starving children.
_______________________
Dear Student:
Fund raisers believe that you have to make the act of donating
> compellingly important (which you did)
> generous -- urge people to give a LOT
> immediately NOW
There is the feeling that if donors postpone giving, it drops off their "To Do List." So I think you should include something about "Do it now"
- "Don't delay! Here's the envelope." (pass them out)
- "Please help NOW! Here is the box for your checks and cash" (pass it around)
- "Please. The need can't wait. My assistant is at the door with a credit card machine, and receipts for your checks and cash" (point to her)
or whatever works for the group you are addressing
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Be specific about the amount you want people to give -- but leave the door open for other amounts too. People don't know what is expected of them, and even if they don't give all you want, at least they have a starting point to adjust it from.
If you don't give them a hint about what you want, they don't know how to react -- so they don't do anything.
"Please support me as I go without everything for 40 hours. A dollar an hour from you will make a huge difference to a little kid dying from hunger, and even 50 cents an hour will stop so much suffering."
_______________________
There is also an idea that donors appreciate a personal "Thank you," so I think you should add that at the end -- YOU thanking them in YOUR name, not in the name of the children you are helping.
"Thank you more than I can say for supporting me in my 40-hour marathon! It is your kindness and generosity that will keep me warm! Thank you for giving as generously as you can."
_______________________________
Best wishes in your noble cause.
Put you in a locked cage in the cafeteria. But the best way through this is sleeping ! Trust me
It Good and makes people realize how unfortunate they are and how lucky we are :)
good luck with your speech :)
it's fine..but stay in a normal mood