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Your identity shouldn't be so tied with work and job...it is only an aspect of you as a person! My mom LOVED her job and was NEVER going to retire...loved it. But she contracted an illness which prevents her from ever working again. She is in chronic pain and VERY depressed because she can't live life like she used to at all. For a good year all she could do was sit around the house and do nothing, never left the house or anything. She felt like a failure. Now she does crafts (which she is REALLY good at) and she found other things to occupy herself with. She still has days when she feels badly about herself...but I think the key is finding something else that you are good at! You can't be so hard on yourself for something that you have no control over. You can find something that you CAN do and do it well without jeopardizing your SSI. What are you good at? What have you always wanted to do but never had the time for? What do YOU like to do? Think about. Your life may not return to how it was...but it can still be good and there are still MANY things for you to be involved with and be productive. Good luck and don't be so hard on yourself!! Adjusting to a new lifestyle takes time...but it isn't impossible if you want to make a change.

you can volunteer at places where people are needed such as the salvation army or the food bank when the holidays come around. at those places, you'll know and feel that you are needed. that's the way you'll find the good in yourself by doing something good. =D