hi.i work part time and luk after our baby.my husband earns about £3000 per month but he still wants most of my money given I only earn £750.i any way give him £400 towards rent and bills and keep the rest for my personal bills.but he always fight with me when I get paid asking for more money given he earns treble the money I earn.he is in terrible debts and I guess most of his money goes off to pay debts and he never tells me what happens to £3000 he earns but he ask what happens to every penny I earn and not happy when I say I have bills to pay too(my mobile.loan etc) .most of debts are as of his stupidity but some towards our rented house deposit and some lawyer fee.he does do all the duties towards the baby and most towards me too.but is it wrong of me to have some of the money for my self as well given he earns a lot and the only reason I cant work f/t is I luk after our baby and when I work f/t I used to give him half half for every thing...the situation is so nasty and I feel like getting divorced? as he kind of mentally an emotionally stresses me saying I am a bad wife. pls advise me..
Update:from £750 I earn some months I save abt £80 and that's the money he is questioning abt.is this right according to his wages and he doesn't tell me wht happens to his money when I ask him??
thanks
Answers & Comments
Tell him that if he wants to pay half the daycare bill for your child you would like to go back to work full time so you can earn money as he is allowed to do. Then to make it fair both of you can save every receipt for anything you buy and any bill you pay, that should even things out better. Point out you are working full time you just currently aren't getting paid to be a mother and care for your child. Otherwise if he doesn't want to pay for the extra daycare expense claim that he will owe you money since you won't be able to work more and you will be the daycare. Also start harassing him and asking every opportunity you have, how much his paycheck will be and where he is spending the money and you want to know down to the penny. Get a join account and use debit card only so it can be recorded......
It sounds like he may have another family and/or a drug related problem. He is using you to pay something you have absolutely nothing to do with. Divorce may definitely have to be it. Before you decide, you are going to have to make a list of how much everything is going to cost if and/or once you get a divorce. You are going to have to figure out babysitting fees, rent fees, utility fees if you are going to have to pay your own bills, pay for your car, gas, and if you are going to have to get a second job.
You husband is extremely selfish. Calculate all of your costs. You are going to have to do this. Why? Because you may choose to be a single and divorced woman, and he may leave you on a whim and in complete surprise. Do it quickly.