Verified answer

when a marine or soldier dies, all connection to the outside world like computers and phones are immediately shut down so the death does not leak out until the family is notified first.

it takes up to 24 hours for that family to be notified then the local media of that area usually gets their hands on that information..

By law the NOK must be notified within 24 hours of the death (18 hours for the report to go from the unit to the casualty operations center in DC and 4 hours from the operations center to the NOK is the standard).

And a media statement is not released until after ALL primary and secondary NOKs are notified. And all communications from the unit are locked down until the NOK os notified and anyone making a unofficial notification (the casualties buddy telling his wife for example) prior to official notification is subject to legal action under the UCMJ.

Here is the regulation that covers it:

http://www.army.mil/usapa/epubs/pdf/r600_8_1.pdf

It can take up to 24 hours for nok to be notified, all the media can say is 'x amount of soldiers where killed in takistan'

I would imagine it would be common courtesy to notify the family first